Questioning Life
by GreenLavender
Summary: They threw him out. They gave him up. It's hard to breathe. [AU, One-Shot]


Slight, really hard to see KisekiKuro and KagaKuro.

Warnings: Mentions of rape (Non-graphic).

* * *

Living was hard, Kuroko decided.

Being tied up and chained inside a cage with your wrists held up and being torn because you're too short too reach the ground felt like hell. Or maybe hell was better than this. Not in the biblical sense but... maybe hell _was_ better. He was blindfolded and gagged with a piece of cloth. Not to mention the violation he felt. He was used, toyed with, and touched so many times that everything became so... _Numb._

They said it was for his own protection but he didn't understand. Where had the loving touches and tender kisses gone? He remembered that there was once another member - Haizaki Shougo. He and Kise had fought on who should violate him first. That hurt. It hurt so much. Why? Why were they torturing him? _Whywhywhywhywhy..._

How could they be the ones defending him when they were the ones to hurt him the most? Not even his enemies were this bad. He thought he could trust them. But the marks, the bruises, the scars... They couldn't even heal until the next session. So how? How could this be protection? _Howhowhowhowhow..._

Sometimes, one of them would tell him not to say anything to the others about what they were doing to him. And, not wanting to be hurt even more, he would reluctantly agree (Not that he had a choice in the first place). But the others would find out that he was lying and would hurt him anyways. It was painful. He didn't even know if they were the friends he knew and loved. Who? Who were these monsters? _Whowhowhowhowho..._

He knew he should have at least tried to escape; maybe his wrists became so thin that he could wiggle his hands out from the cuffs. But he didn't. He didn't know why he didn't try either. He was so tired of everything and even just trying to move out of the binds were hard. One day, maybe he would be free. But when? When would he see natural light? _Whenwhenwhenwhenwhen..._

But to be honest, even if he tried to escape, he wouldn't be able to escape to anywhere. He didn't know the location or the direction of anyplace. And this was his home. The only place he actually knew. He wished he had traveled more often. He hoped to be rescued one day. But to where? Where would he even go? _Wherewherewherewherewhere..._

Kuroko knew that one day, they would probably get tired and sick of him and throw him out. He feared for that day. Maybe he was a masochist. He didn't think so. But nowadays, it was too hard to even think. Kuroko didn't want to be thrown out like garbage. At least here, he had some shelter. He prayed and hoped to stay inside this place.

And he realized there was no god to pray _to_.

Kuroko didn't know where he was, in the midst of green and gray and blue. His former best friend and light, Aomine-kun, had just thrown him on the ground. Literally. Nude and shivering. Where was Akashi-kun to stop him? Where was Kise-kun to tackle him with hugs and kisses? Where was Midorima-kun to help him up? Where was Murasakibara-kun to carry him back?

Where were they?

Kuroko felt something hot, something wet on his cheeks but was fleeting - as it had dropped to the ground beneath him. He was sure it wasn't any of their semen from before.

Tears, then.

Maybe.

_Tears._

He cracked a smile, thinking of a book he had once read that had been written, "We need never be ashamed of our tears."

How Charles Dickens was so wrong.

He was never ashamed his entire life.

_Why was he crying for the monsters who hurt him?_

_How were these tears even coming out when he had thought he had nothing in him?_

_Who was the one allowing all of this to happen?_

_When was he going to die?_

_Where was the hero to save him for the moments of despair?_

Was there really... None?

It was hard.

Breathing.

Living.

"A-Akashi-kun... Aomine-kun, K-Kise-kun, Mura... sakibara-kun, Midorima-kun... _It's hard to breathe_. Save me..."

* * *

"Oi! Bakagami, get here already!"

What was that sound...?

Maybe they were hunters who would end his misery.

That sounded nice.

"Eh, why me?"

"LISTEN TO YOUR SENPAI, IDIOT!"

"OW! HYUUGA-SENPAI WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! You're really scary sometimes... Urgh."

"These roots are so annoying, oi, these are worse than the hurdle training Riko gave us."

"I once had a fear of hurdles, but then I got over it."

"Shut up, Izuki."

"Mah, let's have some f~un~!"

They didn't sound like hunters. A group of friends wandering in the woods, maybe? Did that mean civilization was nearby? Maybe they would kill him. But the voices reminded him so much of his friends...

His thoughts were cut off as he felt something heavy on his back. It felt like a foot but more... Rubbery. Like boots. He gave a slight groan and whimper, expecting a beating from the all-too familiar hands and feet when he heard a shout.

"Oh shit!"

"What's up, Kagami?"

"I think I just stepped on someone! Fuck!"

"HEY! Stop your cursing will you? And I don't see anyone."

"Oi, are you okay?" He felt hands, rough and masculine, flipping him to his back and then carrying him. The warmth was so nice on his naked and depraved body. "Oi." The same hands lightly patted his sunken creeks.

Kuroko opened his eyes, slowly, ever so meekly, and saw fiery red eyes peering down at him. He almost squeaked at its brightness.

He was so... Beautiful.

Like an ethereal, celestial being from heaven.

Was this his savior?

_Why did whoever was above decide to save him?_

_How were these people able to find him?_

_Who was this man?_

_When was he going to die like he had wanted?_

_Where had this heavenly being come from?_

Living and breathing were hard.

_But it would get better, _Kuroko decided.

* * *

_Fin._


End file.
